Ask a Puggle

Ask a Puggle: Bite this!

It’s been a few weeks, but “Ask A Puggle” is back. As usualy, Bruiser the Puggle answers questions from Slate’s always great Dear Prudence columns. Got one for him? Ask here, or leave it in the comments.

Dear Puggle,

During a visit with my brother-in-law’s family, I was sitting at the table chatting when my 3-year-old nephew ran up, screamed, “I am a dragon,” and bit my arm. Shocked and in pain, I ended up hitting him and knocking him over. He started crying and ran to his room. My brother-in-law said, “I know it was almost a reflex, but you can’t come in here and hit my kid.” I totally agree and feel terrible that I struck his son. This is not the first time I have been bitten by this nephew, and he has been sent home from day care because of biting. I now have a bruise where he bit me through my jacket. I have apologized profusely, but I still feel like a monster. How could I have better resolved the situation without resorting to violence?

– Flustered and Hurt

Wow, that kid’s got the right idea. I mean, he should have said, “I’m a dog, grrrrrr.” But dragon’s OK, kind of original I guess. But hitting him? He shouldn’t have ran crying, he should have bitten you more and scratched up your face. Did you at least give him a treat afterward? Maybe he just wanted you to talk him on a walk? Ever think of that?

Want him to stop? Do what my owner does: squirt him in the face with water. Sure, it’s not very nice, and maybe he’ll think you’re playing (that’s what I do to Foodman, makes him angrier. Love it.) Either way, he’ll get the point and you avoid abusing the little punk.

Here’s my question to you: How crappy is your jacket? And he bruised you? You must be weak. Oh, you’re how old? My bad, monster. My bad.

Tags: Ask a Puggle, Bruiser